[Prayers For] A New Beginning

After Christmas Eve mass each adult parishioner was given a book called "Rediscover Jesus". I paged through it when I got home and thought it looked like a neat little devotional book of sorts. I packed it up and brought it with me to Austin.

I just pulled it out to spend some more time really looking at what it was all about. I opened it up to the first chapter which was rightly called, New Beginnings. It was only a few paragraphs long and literally only took me about one full minute to read. It talked about all of the new beginnings and chances we are given in this life. Mondays, New Year's Day, and birthdays were a few that were named. It then concluded with the line "Jesus is the ultimate new beginning". That resonated with me. This new year is bringing a lot of new beginnings and opportunities to "start again". I spent a lot of time in the last three months of the year praying. Praying for Matthew and I to get jobs in Texas, praying for me to be the right fit for the one interview I did have, praying for things at work to go better, prayers for a break from all of my anxieties. Then I prayed for two days on the road for good weather and a safe trip. I prayed for so many things I don't even remember them all. A week after leaving South Dakota I am here ready to begin again.  Now that I am here and ready to start these new chapters in life I am not done praying. I have started praying that Matthew will get his dream job here so he can join me sooner rather than later. I have been praying that my anxiety remains minimal as I forge my way into a new job in a new city. I pray that I will absolutely fall in love with my new job and learn it quickly. I pray that the new apartment I found for us will be home, and not just a temporary stop along the way. I pray that Matthew and I's marriage gets even stronger while we are apart. And I pray that Matthew is able to finish packing our apartment with minimal stress!

I've always been so anxious when things were new. I feel more at peace about this new than any of my previous starts. I know I haven't started work and I have wonderful people taking care of me down here, but that anxiety has remained pretty low for the most part. It hasn't kept me in bed or brought me to tears or made me scream. It hasn't been debilitating or caused me to forget how to handle things. When I start my new job I expect that my anxiety will increase and I only want to remain strong enough to win that battle. I don't want it holding me back or making me wish I wasn't here.

I want this new beginning to be the best yet.


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