Through learning to be mindful and all of that jazz I have recognized one more thing about myself that I have never been cognizant of . I've probably been doing it for quite a long time, maybe even years, without having any idea. This thing, this (bad) habit of mine that I am speaking of is believing I have to prove myself to everyone. Prove that I know what I am talking about, prove that I am a good person, prove that I know I'm doing what I am supposed to be doing, prove my feelings. Pretty much defend and back up my every thought and action. I wish that I could just do things, say things, learn things, and know things without having to put it all out there so that people might believe in me. Do you have any idea how exhausting it is constantly trying to convince people (especially idiots) that what you're feelings is real, no matter if they understand it or not? Let me tell you, it's depleting. I can't just feel or be or do without the follow up explanation. I do
My life with anxiety.