Skip to main content

[Wedding Week] One Year Later

Today starts the one year anniversary of "wedding week". One year ago today I got up and went to a mandatory training for my new "job". Substitute teaching. I got in my car, with my wedding dress in the backseat so I could drop it off to get steamed, went to get coffee, and drove across town. I walked into the school this training was being held at trying not to look lost and confused. I found a seat near the back and sat down. Nothing on the agenda was of any interest to me so I sat near the aisle in case I needed a break. I had barely sat down and looked at my phone. A text message from my best friend and bridesmaid. She had been married for five years at this point and offered me some "wedding week advice" It had me choking back tears. Everything she said were all of the things I told myself I needed to do that week. What a relief that even though I had no idea what I was doing I was on the right track.

When the training was over I went back out to my car, got in, buckled up, turned around to see my wedding dress hanging in the backseat, and cried. I cried happy tears. This was it. The moment I had been hoping would happen my entire life. I was happy, overwhelmed, anxious, scared, and incredibly excited. I think I flipped my visor down to look at myself in the mirror, wiped my tears, and then had a huge smile on my face. I WAS GETTING MARRIED!!! Anyways, I drove to the bridal store and dropped my dress off to get steamed, I  told them I'd be back on Friday morning to get it and they congratulated me and were so happy even though they had no idea who I was. After dropping it off I probably went home, ate lunch, and took a nap. I knew the rest of the week would be fast and furious and sleep would be hard to come by...

After all i was marrying my best friend in five days!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Lost.

Life lately has been hard. I had a rough week and it seems to have carried through the weekend as well. I hate to even admit that because I'm trying to make some changes in my brain. I'm trying to hammer out what a bad day really is. I'm trying to learn what makes a bad day in Meghan's world. I've been down on myself lately and I don't even understand why. Nothing has changed. My anxiety is constant and I feel like I don't even remember what it's like to not be hyper vigilant. I am in this state of constant worry with "what ifs" running rampant in my brain. It's been having difficulty concentrating on my job, being present in conversations, and even caring about myself in general. I've been irritable and tired.  I just haven't been myself and because I don't know what the real issue is I don't know what to do to bring myself back. I'm stuck. I'm full of doubt and worry and none of it is worth the time I spend thinkin
2 comments
Read more

Whatever Happened to Respect?

I've been thinking a lot lately. Shocker, I know. A friend of mine reached out to me a few months ago about my blog. He talked to me about how he had been tossing around the idea of starting a blog. I asked him what he wanted to write about. His reply really shocked me. He told me he often keeps his opinions to himself and is a "people pleaser" during conversations to avoid any arguments or disagreements between him and his friends. He told me that if his friends knew what his real thoughts and feelings on different topics were they would be really surprised. I was shocked! I didn't think he was one to just go with the crowd. I explained to him that I thought that was a great thing to write about and how I have worked my way out of being that same way. We talked about how keeping our mouth shut doesn't do any good in the long run and eventually it starts to really wear on a person to feel like they can never voice their opinion without feeling like your friends wi
1 comment
Read more

i Don't Know How To Do This

Grieving is not something I have ever been good at. It's not that I haven't suffered any loss in my life, because there has certainly been plenty (even one loss is plenty, honestly) it's something else that I can't quite put my finger on. I am fortunate in that I haven't lost a person in my life, in the sense that they are no longer physically alive, in quite a few years. The last people I did lose were older relatives, which I think is different than someone you were close to on a work and personal level. So, here I am trying to figure out how to grieve the very sudden and even more tragic loss of the closest co worker I've probably ever had in Austin. And I don't know how to grieve her loss. She was in a tragic accident on Sunday, and her name was released yesterday afternoon. It was her and her daughter in her vehicle and neither of them survived. Christa was such a bright and happy person. Sure she was 20 years older than me but our connection was perf
Post a Comment
Read more