Skip to main content

40 days and 40 nights

It’s that time of year again..the time where spring is near, the days get longer, and people get all excited about having to give something up for 40 days. The past few years of my (adult) life I have felt a renewed energy when this time of year comes around. I get excited bout the seasons changing and the weather getting warmer, and about the Lenten season and all of the good vibes it seems to bring with it. This year something is different. Ash Wednesday snuck up on me and I was not prepared mentally. The weather has been cold which makes spring feel like an eternity away. With my recent rollercoaster battle with anxiety the energy isn’t there either.
Being the Catholic girl that I am, I grew up always giving something up for lent. I would fight my parents about “being too young” to follow those rules, about not wanting to do it because it was stupid, saying nobody followed it anyways, and eventually giving up something like candy, pop, chocolate, or my favorite….fighting with my brother and sister. Let’s be real. I never followed through with ANY of those things! From what I remember my parents always set good examples for us, so where I got the idea that it was all stupid is beyond me!
When I got a little older I started t understand Lent and the purpose of it. I started giving up meaningful things and felt empowered by that strength. It made me excited to make a change for a good reason and to better myself as a person and as a Christian. I successfully gave up fast food for two years, and gave up pizza with minimal cheats one year. Last year I decided I would start doing something. Well, I failed miserably at that because my “do something” was go to mass more often. It turns out when you are packing to move and moving one week after Easter..you find a lot of excuses to not go. While I believe you don’t need to go to mass every Sunday to be a Christian, I grew up going every single week. Part of me thought it was a bad thing to start doing because it’s something I SHOULD be doing already. Nobody’s perfect, right?
Well with Lent sneaking up on me this year I didn’t have time to really think about what I was going to give up. Beings I’ve already done the fast food (which I never eat anymore anyways) and the pizza thing (not sure I could live!) so I couldn’t do that again, I don’t drink much pop, I rarely drink alcohol during the week, giving up alcohol all together would be a big fat fail before it even started, I don’t bite my nails, I don’t waste money (usually…)…I just didn’t think there was anything worth my efforts of giving up. So I decided I am going to give this “do more” thing a try again this year.
This year for Lent I am going to send more mail! I used to be so good about sending Birthday and special occasion cards along with “just because cards”. I quit doing that with the invention of smart phones and Facebook and it makes me sad. I LOVE getting ANYTHING in the mail that is not junk or a bill! So why shouldn’t I send my friends some love through the good ol fashioned snail mail and make their day a little brighter?! I sent my first package off yesterday. I didn’t intend for it to be my first package but it was something I was planning on sending, and it just so happened that I took it to the post office on…Ash Wednesday! Which gave me the idea to “do a little more”!
Now, I need to collect some addresses…or scrounge up my wedding guest list for addresses. My goal is to send two cards/letters etc. a week. That’s only $1.00 on postage (a week) and if I stock up on 50 cent cards at the Dollar Tree only a few bucks for the entire 40 days! I will make a conscience effort to keep my eyes peeled for little things that remind me of my friends and make small purchases here and there as well.
If doing something for others makes me feel good, it has to make the other person feel good as well.
Lord knows I need all of the good feels I can get.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Lost.

Life lately has been hard. I had a rough week and it seems to have carried through the weekend as well. I hate to even admit that because I'm trying to make some changes in my brain. I'm trying to hammer out what a bad day really is. I'm trying to learn what makes a bad day in Meghan's world. I've been down on myself lately and I don't even understand why. Nothing has changed. My anxiety is constant and I feel like I don't even remember what it's like to not be hyper vigilant. I am in this state of constant worry with "what ifs" running rampant in my brain. It's been having difficulty concentrating on my job, being present in conversations, and even caring about myself in general. I've been irritable and tired.  I just haven't been myself and because I don't know what the real issue is I don't know what to do to bring myself back. I'm stuck. I'm full of doubt and worry and none of it is worth the time I spend thinkin

Whatever Happened to Respect?

I've been thinking a lot lately. Shocker, I know. A friend of mine reached out to me a few months ago about my blog. He talked to me about how he had been tossing around the idea of starting a blog. I asked him what he wanted to write about. His reply really shocked me. He told me he often keeps his opinions to himself and is a "people pleaser" during conversations to avoid any arguments or disagreements between him and his friends. He told me that if his friends knew what his real thoughts and feelings on different topics were they would be really surprised. I was shocked! I didn't think he was one to just go with the crowd. I explained to him that I thought that was a great thing to write about and how I have worked my way out of being that same way. We talked about how keeping our mouth shut doesn't do any good in the long run and eventually it starts to really wear on a person to feel like they can never voice their opinion without feeling like your friends wi

i Don't Know How To Do This

Grieving is not something I have ever been good at. It's not that I haven't suffered any loss in my life, because there has certainly been plenty (even one loss is plenty, honestly) it's something else that I can't quite put my finger on. I am fortunate in that I haven't lost a person in my life, in the sense that they are no longer physically alive, in quite a few years. The last people I did lose were older relatives, which I think is different than someone you were close to on a work and personal level. So, here I am trying to figure out how to grieve the very sudden and even more tragic loss of the closest co worker I've probably ever had in Austin. And I don't know how to grieve her loss. She was in a tragic accident on Sunday, and her name was released yesterday afternoon. It was her and her daughter in her vehicle and neither of them survived. Christa was such a bright and happy person. Sure she was 20 years older than me but our connection was perf