Skip to main content

Turn Turn Turn...

I keep hoping that something exciting or uplifting will happen in my life for me to blog about after the past few downer posts. Unfortunately things have not taken a drastic turn for me just yet. I am still trucking along feeling like something is missing in my life. While I have gotten closer to figuring out what that something is, I basically still have the same feelings of being sad for no reason and more anxious than usual.

My husband and I were SO excited to move to Sioux Falls last spring. We don't hate it here at all, but for the first time (probably ever) we are on the same page about what we need to do for US. We both have had the same realizations about how things are going and are aware of what we need to do to make some changes. We haven't made any big life changing decisions, but we have been talking about a plan to do so. We both realize that while we are happy with each other, our marriage, living in Sioux Falls, we aren't as happy as we deserve to be. We are young and we spend our evenings at home together talking about what we "should do" "wish we could do" "want to do" ect. Well, it's time to start actually DOING.

We both have some big things coming up in our lives that could start the process of change for us. For the first time we don't even have to argue about what we think the next big move for us should be. When I met Matthew and started to get serious with him he always had these dreams of wanting to move to a bigger city where the life there was fast paced and amazing. I doubted his ability to take me away from "home" and make me happy. I don't doubt that anymore. I am thirsty for me out of life, and I know it won't happen here.

I'm still hoping to wake up one day and these feelings of not feeling like myself will be gone, but for now I am fighting the good fight and doing the best I can to stay sane and enjoy life!

I'm in love with cities I've never been to and people I've never met | The most beautiful parts of life are still unfolding

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Lost.

Life lately has been hard. I had a rough week and it seems to have carried through the weekend as well. I hate to even admit that because I'm trying to make some changes in my brain. I'm trying to hammer out what a bad day really is. I'm trying to learn what makes a bad day in Meghan's world. I've been down on myself lately and I don't even understand why. Nothing has changed. My anxiety is constant and I feel like I don't even remember what it's like to not be hyper vigilant. I am in this state of constant worry with "what ifs" running rampant in my brain. It's been having difficulty concentrating on my job, being present in conversations, and even caring about myself in general. I've been irritable and tired.  I just haven't been myself and because I don't know what the real issue is I don't know what to do to bring myself back. I'm stuck. I'm full of doubt and worry and none of it is worth the time I spend thinkin...
2 comments
Read more

Whatever Happened to Respect?

I've been thinking a lot lately. Shocker, I know. A friend of mine reached out to me a few months ago about my blog. He talked to me about how he had been tossing around the idea of starting a blog. I asked him what he wanted to write about. His reply really shocked me. He told me he often keeps his opinions to himself and is a "people pleaser" during conversations to avoid any arguments or disagreements between him and his friends. He told me that if his friends knew what his real thoughts and feelings on different topics were they would be really surprised. I was shocked! I didn't think he was one to just go with the crowd. I explained to him that I thought that was a great thing to write about and how I have worked my way out of being that same way. We talked about how keeping our mouth shut doesn't do any good in the long run and eventually it starts to really wear on a person to feel like they can never voice their opinion without feeling like your friends wi...
1 comment
Read more

Before Thirty

In five days I will turn 30. In five days I will no longer be a 20-something. I will end one decade of my life and start another one. I will have to remember to change the 2 to a 3 when someone asks me how old I am, or rather, when I tell someone (because it's rude to ask a lady's age, right?) I can't believe that my years of being a 20 something are coming to an end. At times it felt like my 20s flew by, but most of the time I feel like they actually lasted a nice, long time. I never imagined myself living to be 21, and now here I am. Closing out the chapter of my life that really, truly, made me who I am today. Once I hit 21, and then 22, and eventually 25 and so on, I realized that I made it much farther in life than I ever imagined I would, and that maybe life wasn't so bad after all. Last week when we were on vacation I asked Matthew what day it was, (because who keeps track of time and days on vacation?!) and he told me it was April 7th. I think my jaw literally d...
1 comment
Read more